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1.) Heat pan on stove until water droplets tossed on sizzle and evaporate instantly
2.) Add oil [I used "wok oil" because it's already got the ginger and garlic in it]
3.) Add some of your previously-cooked pasta
4.) Reach up and silence overly-eager smoke alarm
5.) Start trying to stir-fry it with a heat-resistant plastic spoon
6.) Add more pasta and oil as oil disappears and/or pasta is fried
7.) Serve — with whatever seasoning you like.  Me, I just nuked the leftover pasta sauce that was also in the fridge and poured it over.

PREP TIME: Two listenings to “Lolli Lolli” by Three 6 Mafia [about nine minutes].

Three 6 Mafia, \”Lolli Lolli\”

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An ad campaign for McDonald’s in Europe.  At least it’s different.

I have often wondered why McDonald’s still advertises in the traditional manner.  We get it.  You have hamburgers and chicken shapes and salads and fancy coffee and So Much More.  You have a store about every five blocks.  I’m not going to wake up tomorrow and forget you’re in business, and even if I did, I would start jonesing for your french fries within a few days and remember you again.  If you did something like “we’re not going to buy our usual dozens of ads for a week and donate that money we would’ve spent to some kind of hunger campaign or research on cancer” or something, that would mean a great deal more to me than another ad with a remixed version of your latest jingle.

Incidentally, the above goes for any fast food chain, soft drink, or really anyone who advertises anything anywhere.

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In a spellbinding display of arrogance, Greg Daddytypes offers a dollar — no, make it two — to his readers who are presumably too cheap to buy his preferred brand of bodysuit. As for me, If I’mma afford a five-hundred-dollar stroller to load into my Audi A6 Avant, something’s going to have to give. I nominate the quickly outgrown and easily disposable onesie bodysuit spit-up formula catcher.

You know what, DaddyTypes.com? My New Year’s Resolution was to slim down the number of RSS feeds in my NetNewsWire, and… New Year’s just came! Keep your two dollars. Babycenter may not be powered by MovableType, but at least it’s given the wife advice she can use and a place to trade Enfamil coupons.

For those keeping track, this takes me down to 120 feeds. =(

UPDATE July 11, 2007: Daddytypes actually really took it to the upscale-baby-furniture folks today. Yes, this means I’m reading it after all.

technorati tags: baby, blogs, wantlist

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CNN covers the denouement of the Wendy’s Chili Fiasco.

“Thankfully, law enforcement thwarted their successful efforts at theft,” said Deputy District Attorney David Boyd.

Well, which is it? Successful or thwarted? It can’t be BOTH, law enforcement.

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I have been doing this for years. Around here we don’t call it a “man date” and get all self-conscious about it, we call it the Sepatown Detroit Film Society ["Sepatown" after an affirmative Pootie Tang uses in conversation -- I think]. Granted, we wind up eating mostly at bars, but still. Often there is a movie involved. Occasionally up to five members of the society attend a meeting, but more often than not it’s just me and Bill. Maybe it’s just because we’re in Detroit and not New York, but I have never gotten the urge to drop my mug and make out with Bill. I believe Bill will echo these sentiments.

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• The Last Hardee’s In Southeastern Michigan, which was on Coolidge near 11-Mile in Berkeley, is now called “Arnie’s.” Same people, and they still had the Hardee’s menu boards when I was there last, but they dumped Coke for Pepsi and finally pulled the trigger on the whole Golf thing [if you’ve been in there, you know what I mean, all the golf “art” on the walls]. I don’t get there all that often — the last time was to ask them what the deal was with the three charges that mysteriously appeared on my credit card a couple of weeks back. They pled ignorance. I believe them [that they are ign’ant].
• There is a Hot-N-Now drive through on Wayne Road between Ford and Cherry Hill in… is that Garden City or Westland? Heck if I know. I happened ‘crost it by accident while looking for the cheapest gas [if you didn’t know, Westland has cheap gas]. Hot-N-Now is a small, Michigan-based chain of inexpensive drive-through burger joints. The one I knew best was on Washtenaw in Ypsi, and fed me lunch often through some of my commuting years at EMU. It is now the Icescapes drive-through ice cream joint, and I am told that Icescapes serves the super-premium Haagen-Dazs style of ice cream, not just your typical ice-cream-stand soft serve. But I digress.
• I was getting some fried chicken at the White Castle/Church’s on Ford Road at 275 later that night, and I had a coupon that came in one of those bundles of fliers you get in the mail every few days. The clerk acted like I ordered in Urdu. I told her I wanted the 2-pc. for $2.49, and she put me down for a 10-piece. I told her I had a coupon and she thought I was lying or that the coupon wasn’t valid “yet.” [It expires Saturday, 6/26.] After repeated explanation she finally put me down for what I asked for. When I got up to the window I showed her the flier and she called everyone else over to stare at it and then forgot to give it back to me in case I wanted to burn the other coupons. I fixed that real quick. Funny thing is I went back tonight with my brothers and went inside to avoid her — she was working the inside register this time, and the person in front of us was demanding their money back because she’d forgotten their drink.
• One more digression — one day I went to McDonald’s and asked for two Q.P.s, no cheese. I get back to work and open them — cheesy! So I go back, after work, and explain what they did wrong. The clerk asks if she can see the sandwiches. So I show her my two stone-cold, hours-old Q.P.’s. She turns around and calls to her co-worker, “HE HAS PROOF!” Yes, I had established the burden of proof for two QPs, retail value $2.
  This was the McD’s on Mich. Ave. in Saline across from the Fishteord Saline Plant, if you’re keeping track.

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Because I’d trackback this piece as I offered my own views, henceforthwithal:

Despite being firmly ensconced in the midwest, I don’t like cheese. I try to avoid or subtract it whenever possible.

My two outstanding exceptions are on pizza [I’ve tried pizza with no cheese, and it’s just not right] and on Taco Bell tacos [it’s just not worth the trouble of asking them to leave it off].

I like the tangy, artificial taste of Kraft. If it tasted more “authentic” I probably wouldn’t like it so well. And I like the powdered version much better than the Kraft “Deluxe” mac-n-cheez with the sauce in the little can. It seems to me that the sauce takes on a bitter taste in the can.

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Men’s Health makes with the consumer advice.

I suppose it goes without saying, but Planters Nut Poppers did not make the list. I tried the Original flavor once as part of my effort to bring really scary-sounding snack foods into the office. Once I brought a bag of Soy Nuts in, and some wiseguy wrote a “B” over the “S” in Soy. Get it? So I saw the Planters Nut Poppers and figured they were pretty much graffiti-proof. What are you going to add to make a name like Nut Poppers funnier?

Anyway, they sort of reminded me of Nutter Butter cookies, if the cookies were really, really salty. This poor guy tried Original and Cheddar and wrote an article about it.

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Thanks to Black Table, I’ll never have to wonder how Czechvar compares to Steel Reserve.

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